The Importance of Self-Acceptance in Leadership
Steel, Sweat, and Empathy’
“Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we’ll ever do.”
— Brené Brown
Grab your hard hats and safety goggles, because we're about to dive into a story that'll make you rethink everything you thought you knew about leadership.
It's time to talk about Wayne Alderson and how he turned a struggling steel factory into a powerhouse of productivity and positivity. This isn't just any old business turnaround tale - it's a masterclass in the power of empathy and valuing people.
It's the 1970s, and Pittron Steel in Glassport, Pennsylvania, near Pittsburgh is not a great place to work. The place is a mess - dirty windows, dim lighting, and everyone's at each other's throats.
Enter Wayne Alderson, our unlikely hero. Wayne Alderson’s big “aha!” moment about why valuing staff is so important came during his time as vice president of operations at Pittron Steel.
The company was a mess—on the verge of bankruptcy, morale in the gutter, workers constantly filing grievances, and productivity heading south. It was a total disaster. Wayne was handed the unenviable task of turning things around, and instead of going the usual route of cracking the whip, he decided to try something radical: treating people like they actually mattered. Crazy idea, right?
So, what sparked this change? Well, Wayne believed deep down that putting people first wasn’t just good for business—it was simply the right thing to do. He started small by making the factory a better place to work. He painted walls, cleaned windows, and spruced up the place so it didn’t feel like a dungeon. But more importantly, he made it personal. Wayne went out of his way to connect with employees—learning their names, shaking hands at shift changes, and saying “thank you” for their hard work. At first, people were like, What’s this guy up to? But over time, those small gestures started building trust.
One moment that really cemented his philosophy was when he helped a maintenance worker who was struggling with alcoholism. Instead of showing him the door (which would’ve been the easy route), Wayne sent him to rehab and even covered his family’s expenses while he got back on his feet. That act of kindness wasn’t just life-changing for the worker—it sent a message loud and clear to everyone else: Wayne genuinely cared about his people.
And guess what? It worked! The toxic atmosphere at Pittron Steel started shifting. Grievances went from 1,200 (yes, you read that right) to zero. Absenteeism? Gone. Productivity shot up by 64%, and the company went from losing $6 million to making $6 million in just 21 months. Boom! That’s when Wayne realized he was onto something big: treating employees with respect and dignity wasn’t just good for them—it was good for business too.
So yeah, Wayne’s epiphany wasn’t some lightning bolt out of nowhere. It came from rolling up his sleeves, doing what felt right, and seeing firsthand how much people thrive when they’re valued and respected. Turns out, happy employees make for a happy company!
Cosmic Lottery Winners
Now, let's talk about you for a bit. Wayne's story isn't just about turning around a steel factory. It's about the power of embracing your own uniqueness and seeing that same uniqueness in others. It's about realizing that leadership isn't about being the boss with the biggest office and the fanciest title - it's about connecting with people on a human level.
And speaking of uniqueness, did you know that the odds of you even existing are basically zero? This guy, Dr. Ali Benazir broke it down like this: he calculated the chances of your parents meeting, falling in love, having kids, and then the exact right sperm meeting the exact right egg to make you. Then he went even further back, looking at all your ancestors and their perfect timing. His conclusion? You're more unlikely than a snowball surviving in a volcano.
He puts it this way: imagine two million people each rolling a trillion-sided die (yeah, that's a thing in this scenario), and they all land on the same number. That's how improbable your existence is. Mind-blowing, right?
So what does this mean for you as a leader? Well, if your very existence is a miracle, then guess what? So is everyone else's on your team. When you start seeing people this way - as walking, talking miracles - it changes everything. Suddenly, Bob from accounting isn't someone who you hardly talk to and just provides your monthly management accounts. He's a one-in-a-trillion miracle, just like you.
Superhero Capes and Self-Acceptance
When you embrace your own existence as a leader, it's like giving everyone else permission to do the same. Suddenly, you've got a team where people aren't afraid to share ideas, where everyone feels like they belong, and where mistakes are just part of learning. It's like creating a workplace where everyone's wearing their invisible superhero cape.
Here's the deal: self-acceptance is like a superpower for leaders. When you're cool with who you are - quirks, flaws, and all - it creates this awesome ripple effect. Your team starts feeling like they can be themselves too. It's like you're giving them an all-access pass to their own personalities. Suddenly, Shy Sally might speak up in meetings, and Perfectionist Pete might admit he doesn't have all the answers.
This self-acceptance thing? It's not just about feeling good (though that's a nice bonus). It's about creating a culture where people feel safe to express themselves. When people aren't wasting energy trying to fit into some cookie-cutter mould, they can focus on actually doing great work. It's like taking off a pair of too-tight shoes - suddenly, you can walk (or in this case, work) so much better.
And let's talk about getting this empathetic edge. It's not just about being nice (though that's a good start). It's about really getting your team, understanding what makes them tick. It's about creating a space where people can speak their minds without fear of getting shot down faster than a paper airplane in a hurricane. It's about treating yourself with kindness when you mess up, so your team knows it's okay to be human.
Building a Culture That Shines
Building this kind of empathetic culture isn't just good for the your team - it's good for business. When people feel understood and valued, they're more likely to go the extra mile. They're more likely to come up with those crazy ideas that just might change the game. It's like fertilizer for innovation, but instead of plant food, it's genuine human connection.
Here are some ways you can start building this empathetic, self-accepting culture:
Value yourself first: If you can't appreciate your own unique awesomeness, how can you appreciate that of others? Start by giving yourself a mental high-five every day.
Learn to be a super listener: When someone's talking, really listen. Don't just wait for your turn to speak. It's amazing what you can learn when you actually pay attention.
Embrace the weird: Encourage your team to bring their full selves to work. If that means Hawaiian shirt Fridays or a weekly bad joke contest, so be it.
Make mistakes a learning party: When someone messes up (including you), treat it like a chance to grow, not a reason to hide under the desk.
Celebrate the small wins: life's too short not to celebrate the little things.
The bottom line? Having the empathic edge as a leader isn't just about hitting targets or making the big bucks. It's about helping people become the best versions of themselves. It starts with valuing yourself - warts and all - and then spreading that vibe to your whole team. When you believe in yourself and own your flaws, you're in a much better position to lift up everyone around you.
So, channel your inner Wayne Alderson. Clean those metaphorical windows, greet your people by name, and remember - you're a one-in-a-trillion miracle leading a bunch of other miracles. How cool is that?
Now go forth and lead with empathy! Create a workplace where people are excited to show up, where ideas flow, and where everyone feels like the unique, incredible miracle they are. Because at the end of the day, that's what real leadership is all about - helping others shine their brightest. And who knows? You might just change the world, one empathetic interaction at a time.
The Big Questions
1. How do I let my team know I actually care about them as people, not just as “the crew”? What small things can I do to make them feel seen and appreciated?
2. When stuff gets messy, do I usually boss people around or try to understand what’s really going on?
3. Am I cool with being my weird, imperfect self as a leader?
How could being more real help my team feel comfy being themselves too?
4. How do I deal with screw-ups, mine and theirs?
What if I treated mistakes like a “no big deal, let’s learn” moment instead of a freak-out?
This article is from Neil latest book, ‘‘The Leadership Book -achieving the empathetic edge’’, which will be published in January 2026